I get so many requests to re-post this to my Facebook page, I decided to add it to my website…I hope this clears up any questions you have about what’s going on inside your man’s head.

One of the things they teach you in psychotherapy 101 is that it isn’t the therapist’s role to tell patients whether or not they should end a relationship. After all, isn’t it up to you to decide your own course? Well – Today I am going to break that rule.  I’ve seen too many people wasting too many years suffering and hoping beyond hope that somehow their dead-end relationships will magically get better–All the while I knew full-well the relationship was going to fail anyway.

It is amazing how much my patients pay me to ignore my advice. I make suggestions week after week and they do everything in their power to avoid doing things differently. They act as if simply coming for therapy and chatting with me will somehow magically make change happen. The reason for this is simple:

Life is uncertain. This truth is the Bain of human existence. Fear of uncertainty is at the core of all sorts of problems ranging from procrastination and the inability to make decisions, to full-blown anxiety disorders. Moving forward in life is simply too scary when you can’t know for sure how things are going to turn out.

People are annoying. You can’t live with ‘em and you can’t live without ‘em. They trigger all our emotions and often inconveniently so. It would be great if we could be happy without needing others in our lives, right? Then we wouldn’t be vulnerable to so much conflict and heartbreak. If we could just find a way to rely solely on ourselves for serenity, then life would be so much simpler.

People throw the word trust’ around but have no idea what it actually means. Trustworthy is just code for being dependable’. And your trust bar’ is based on the amount of dependability you require from another person in order to feel satisfied in the relationship.

Faith. Most folks think it is strictly a religious term, but it actually means “to believe in something with strong conviction”. It seems like people’s faith has been tested more as of late with all the loss and tragedy around us. As a person who tends to be skeptical of religious dogmas, I am frequently asked: Pizzuls, what do you have faith in?

For over 30 years, Dr. Cynthia Pizzulli is an individual, marriage, and couples therapy help others have healthy relationships. Specializing in a wide range of troublesome life battles I believe that there is not just “one way” to do treatment.